Six years ago my son was born. It was a joyous and welcome day, and I was proud to be his parent. That first few months was a complete whirlwind – amazing, overwhelming, frightening, exciting, happy – pretty much every single emotion you can think of. I was a first time mom, and I considered myself a bit older than the average first time mom at 35. I felt a bit adrift that first year or so, and wasn’t sure who to talk to when I needed a friend.

I found myself between two groups of my pre-child friends: those who were parents, but whose kids were 7,8,9, or even 13, and those who had no plans for kids. My mom was a big help for me when I needed some input on my child’s growth and development, but she lived in another city and I really wanted to have some parent friends to hang out with in person. I needed a Parent Tribe to hang out with.

Now that my son is in elementary school, it has been easy to find a group of like minded parents that I enjoy their company and value their opinions and advice through the PAC and in the school yard. In those early days before my son was school age, however, it was really hard and I felt quite isolated at times. Here’s three pieces of advice I’ve learned along the way:

Get out of the house. In New West, we hit up the public library, Family Place, Motoring Munchkins and Strong Start a lot in those early days. There were lots of parents for me to connect with, and lots of parents with kids of about the same age as mine. It gave us a fun activity to do, and the social time was as good for me as it was for my son.

Don’t be shy – say hi. I found it really hard to strike up conversations at the playground and out at events, but after forcing myself a few times to say hello and make a bit of small talk, it got easier. I started making a point of being the one to say hello to the parent who looked terrified and it made me feel good to make them feel welcome.

Trade info and follow-through. This is a hard one. How many times have you said “We should get together sometime?” and then never followed up? I know for me it was quite a few times. I made a point of asking for contact information from the parents I found myself talking to info and even set reminders to call them the next week. It was hard at first, but I soon found myself surrounded with other parents I liked and respected.

Having a Parent Tribe to call on for advice, support, laughs, and even to trade babysitting was a real blessing for me those first early years. Many of those parents are still in our lives today, and I’m so glad to call them friends.

Jen Arbo is a New West parent who blogs at www.arbolog.com and tweets at www.twitter.com/jenarbo.